Thursday, September 27, 2012

Adventures of the Good Squad

Adventures of the Goon Squad

 
“Anything silly is worth doing well”
        -   a stamp my uncle uses on his letters














Climbing is one of the sillier human endeavors.  I recall that Sir Edmund Hillary, upon returning exhausted and battered from an expedition, was asked by Nepalese villagers why he tried to go over the mountain rather than walk around it to get to the other side.  The usefulness or practicality of the effort to climb up the steep sides of things can simply not be proved.  But climbing is, for many of us, a completely irresistible pull, and we bend our schoolwork, jobs, and sometimes entire lifestyles in order to spend as much time as possible in upward pursuits.  What drives young people with college degrees to quit work and spend months on the road, sleeping in drainage ditches outside of desert towns, wearing the knees out of their pants, eating carrots and peanut butter and goodies from the dumpster behind King Soopers, snooping around campgrounds avoiding rangers like outlaws, and despite the appearance of poverty remain totally psyched? 


morning niceties in the Brave Little Toaster

At Colorado College a core group of climbers coalesced around similar values: getting out to new places, trying really hard, not getting benighted, and doing it in silly costumes.  From afternoon excursions to the Garden of the Gods to spring break rambles across Utah and Arizona, we enjoyed a lot of fun rock and showed up at many a crag sporting outlandish outfits and awesome (hideous) stick-on tatoos.  At some point someone called us the “goon squad,” and I think that title fits.  Following strict adherence to a ratio of 30% try-hard, 20% silly costumes, 20% sending tattoos, 15% tasty summit snacks, and 15% Tecate (with lime, of course), we have been able to enjoy a decent amount of quality rock climbing, survive a fair share of questionable rock climbing, have a whole dang bunch of fun, and not get a car stuck (yet!).


three goons atop Lone Peak, Wasatch Mtns, Utah

 the DMFay topping out Monster Tower in impeccable style

the usual state of things

I assumed that David had brought is A-game for his impressive neon clown ascent of Monster Tower and Washer Woman; I was wrong.  The next day David busted a move that took the club down by debuting an authentic Colorado College baseball uniform on our free ascent of the precarious Standing Rock in Monument Basin.  True class!

Wild Iris, August, preparing for some serious sport whippin after a week of trad climbing.  Right now I'm thinking: "I either need to send, or I'll be laughed off the wall"


DBR going for the Fruit Bowl King Swing with some real chuztpa, no doubt encouraged by the Wal-Mart St Paddy's special on his head








The Sharper World


A sunny Saturday at Indian Creek, tired and not sending, my hands ripped from their tortured devotion.  More cracks loom all around, each an invitation to try, to get whupped, to see if I have the strength and tenacity and elegance to dance with its brutal simplicity. 

So many opportunities, and I’m so tired.  The dance is so hard.  Why am I trying?  Why did I drive here alone on a weekend, to struggle and bleed and drink beer with tired hands with these stoic men?  Why do I keep running?



Thoughts drift to loss and sadness…the tendrils of a dream.  Memories of love, days spent basking in a woman’s sunshine, the bliss of togetherness.  Days of friendship, with our own rains but absent of the sting of isolation, the endless march, feeling the weight of my tired feet.

Someone at the wall needs a toprope put up so I grovel out of my perch amongst the rocks and shake the cobwebs from my head, rack up.  In itself an act of intention.  The climb is a 5.10 finger layback into a thin-hands slot, don’t need extra gear, it’ll go.  On the vertical again, pulling hard above a piece, pushing the possible fall out of mind beneath me, only movement is upward.

Clipping the anchors on a wall of chocolate in the early evening, the gulf of air all around, the ravens circling, the valley verdant in spring foliage, life blossoming in cactus and cottonwoods in the desert.  Lean out and breathe it in, my back sore and rippling under my shirt, my hands crusty and stiff.  This is why. 



Lowering to the ground amongst sore, sweaty people, and for now, because of now, they are friends.  Lounging on a boulder in the fading sunlight, commenting on the progress of comrades above, sharing pains, telling lies and fueling dreams.  Letting bare feet smudge into the coarse red dirt, climbers above, etched in shadow against the rock, still in that sharper world.

Ryan grunts as he attempts to swing a meaty wrestler’s thigh into the gaping crack above his head. Large cams hang beneath his shoulders on a sling, dangling like some whimsical wind chimes as he shudders to get purchase.  Scott belaying, silent, stoic.  In their world each edge of rock is sharp, each line clear, each feature and curve of stone critical in its size and texture.  The light slices across immutable edges, the rope, their lifeline, threads humbly over unchanging stone.  Never more clear that we are visitors. 

Below, the edges soften.  Features blur together into aggregate forms, lumped together for simplicity: pillar, talus, corner, ground.  No longer tuned to the whispering rhythm of rock and cliff, the mind drifts to softer hues: the view below, the panorama of canyonlands, conversations, water.  The sun dips into some untrodden tract of desert, the golden hour falls on the Second Meat Wall; conversation mingles with the pop of beer cans, truth and lies.  Our world soft, our bodies relaxed after the fight.  Climbers still above, perched on the cliff like some forgotten gargoyles, clawing their way toward heaven.

The sky above, the dirt below. 







Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Honoring Tradition: Scrappy Dudes and Summiting Nudes

A tribute to scrappy dudes getting naked on summits

Dan Rothberg, David Fay, myself, Lone Peak, UT

The tradition's founder, Noah "Gotsteez" Gostout, atop Warbonnet, Cirque of the Towers, WY



Dan Rothberg, Lone Peak



 Dan, David, myself, Monster Tower, Canyonlands, UT

 Dan and David, Standing Rock, Canyonlands, UT.  Keep in mind the summit is about 20 ft square.
Note helmets and chalk bags for safety.

ritual slicing of the cantaloupe

all the necessary ingredients for a delightful summit picnic




An impromptu nude ascent of the final slab pitch of Argon Tower, Arches, UT







yarr!!! this climbing thing is driving me nuts!


Backcountry Nude ambassadors John Collis and David Fay, at work in the Bighorn Mountains, WY




strong work gentlemen.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Fear and Dehydration in Colorado's Biggest Hole

Fear and Dehydration in Colorado’s Biggest Hole
More adventures in the Black Canyon of the Gunnison
The Flakes V 5.10+ X


Early summer in Durango is great.  Blissful.  Idyllic.  A typical afternoon usually involves waking up from a sound nap and lounging in the shade of the yard behind Rowan’s house, drinking homemade smoothies and cold beer while watching birds flutter and the sky fade towards evening, maybe rallying for a pump-out sesh at the Golf Wall (our local overhanging grid-bolted limestone crag) as the day’s heat subsides, maybe discussing what to make for dinner and curling up with a book.  It takes a lot to pull me away from this eden, and for most sane people the thought of waking at dawn to descend into Colorado’s deepest chasm and claw our way back to top by our fingertips before dark is not in the least a temptation. 

For better or for worse, I’m not completely sane, and neither is Rowan Hill: esteemed baker of breads, do-it-yourself project enthusiast, and fellow cliff wrestler.  A strong boulderer, Rowan recently caught the fever of multi-pitch trad climbing.  Having climbed just a few multi-pitch bolted moderate routes in his Swiss homeland, he was game to come to the Black Canyon with his roommate Tucker Hancock and myself this May for a primer in climbing long routes.  We warmed up as a party of three with the pleasurable Comic Relief our first day, enjoyed Journey Home the next, and on the third I joined other friends on The Cruise while Rowan and Tucker demonstrated their quickly learned competence by climbing Midsummer Night’s Dream.  Not to be satisfied by a mere three days of grade IV routes, the pair returned the next weekend and sent The Cruise in good style.  I think back to my days of cutting my teeth on long routes, leading off-route on Castleton tower in the dark, untangling rappel ropes while dangling in the windy dark in Red Rocks, squinting desperately through hail at a stuck rope on the Diamond as night fell, stumbling back to Dan Rothberg’s car after midnight for the 12th time…I shake my head…

Ever since climbing Astrodog (V 5.11+) with Noah Gostout last June, an ascent which pulled Grade V out of the realm of dreams into the  possible, I’d been stewing on the idea of climbing The Flakes (V 5.10+ X), generally considered the ‘Dog’s technically easier, but more grueling and more dangerous, ugly brother.  While the grade seemed certainly manageable, the thing that kept me away for a year was the 5.9 X chimney halfway up the route.  I’ve climbed a lot of chimneys, and runnout is part of the game in most of them, but the idea of running it out that far, where a fall would be…not an option…was not something I liked to think about before bed.  However, after a solid season in the Creek and consistent hard cragging around Durango all spring, followed by three clean sends in the Black two weeks earlier, I could visualize myself up in that chimney and remain calm, palms dry.  I knew it was time to do it. 

Luckily, a man in mired in the clutches of climbing stoke is easily motivated to do ludicrous things.  All it took was a suggestive text message Friday afternoon, and Rowan and I were pouring over the guidebook that evening, discussing the rack.  “This will be a great intro to Grade V, man.” The realist voice: yeah right.  The justifying voice (climbers develop this one real well): he’s Swiss, he’s tough.

Saturday evening we jammed over HWY 550 through the rugged heart of the San Juan mountains past Silverton and on towards Ouray as the peaks slowly faded into crimson alpenglow.  A quick stop for gas and victory snacks (I’ve recently discovered the dark chocolate Mounds Bar) in Montrose and we were soon bedding down in a vacant campsite on the South Rim of Colorado’s biggest hole.

Rappelling into the Black Canyon takes a certain willing suspension of rationality.  At the rim you are safe, and in front of you is a 2000-ft deep chasm with a torrential river at the bottom and nothing but sheer walls out: danger.  Quick glance at the sun hovering over the eastern horizon, trace it’s arc through the sky to the west: it goes from there to there, we have that much time.  A gallon of water.  Gel shots with caffeine. 2 Clif Bars.  Headlamps.  We can make it.  The best way to start is to just throw the ropes and begin descending before your brain realizes what you’re doing and has legitimate grounds to protest.

 

We crushed out the rappels in 1:45 and began swinging leads up the first 4 pitches; soon I was scrambling up to Rowan’s belay beneath the infamous “X” chimney.  Sure enough, there it was: a gaping, gorilla-size fissure that kept going upward beyond the field of vision, no protectable features in sight.  I knew this moment was going to be like jumping off a cliff into water: if I contemplate the distance too long my brain will freak out and demand a truce; the only way to jump is to just walk up and jump.  I grabbed the rack, took a gulp of water and started stemming up into the void. 





Call it karma or the anthropic principle; the earth was built for climbers.  The first stretch of chimney, the widest, has a ladder of subtle face holds on one side and climbs like 5.7 up to a legitimate nut placement before the holds run out and I had to commit to pure chimney technique.  Soon I fell into the rhythm of work: scum knees, palms down, grunt, squirm.  Mental chatter refined to just the necessary: yes, this is just 5.9.  The friction’s pretty good.  At this distance the nut won’t help.  Keep my heart rate under control. I knew enough not to look down; at some point I looked up and saw the chimney continuing interminably, and I felt the first cold sweat of panic bead on my neck.  Reel it in, that’s not allowed. Focus on the present.  All that exists in the world: palm, knee, butt, heel.  Nuances in the weathered stone to push on.  In this mode, the movement became my meditation; focus kept fear at bay, on the outskirts of vision, like a bat fluttering by at dusk.  Time and distance passed, I was at a good rest within reach of a fortuitous chockstone, slung it, continued on. 
 


It’s a long pitch.  At one point I chose the tighter path for security and got stuck, burned lots of energy grunting and gasping, eventually accepted reality and retreated from the bottleneck by slithering downward, exhaling and relaxing my core for a second and sliding a few inches down…towards nothing.  At this point the work of progress had become so all-consuming that there was no room for fear, only the desire to escape the tight squeeze and gain the wider chimney where I could finally move…after much work I made it and was beginning to catch my labored breath when the whole canyon began to roar.  I perched there incredulous, wondering what calamity was occurring, expecting the walls to crumble, when of all things a fighter jet executed a sharp turn through the canyon and sped out of view, its gale-force rumble receding slowly with it.  Wedged in the crack, I envied the young man on a million-dollar joyride.  We took this unexpected visit to be a good omen, and with new resolution I began steadily progressing up to where the chimney widens adjacent to a small ledge. 

 

Tunnel vision is a phenomenon I often experienced in my first years climbing; while gripped on lead, I would sometimes miss a key foothold, a helpful stem, or a nearby crack.  That pitch on The Flakes I must have been mired deep in the tunnel, because somehow I looked at the gaping flare running up to an offwidth, glanced at the convenient ledge equipped with fixed gear, and decided that the pitch kept going.  I think the constant exposure and effort had reduced my mental state to base primate reactivity, the grim satisfaction of stomaching exhaustion and lunging into a foe again.  The sensation reminded me of paddling out into winter swells on the California coast, getting rocked by a wave and scrambling back onto my board in a churning chaos of foam, sizing up the next three incoming waves which I could probably not break through and paddling headlong into them anyway with gritted teeth.

I clipped the fixed gear and moved up into the flare, pushing further and further on smeared feet with half my back shoved into the wall, until I realized that things were really serious and it occurred to me that I’d passed the anchor.

“How much rope?”
“You’re out.”
Shit.  

It was still 10 feet to the offwidth, where I could place my biggest cam.  No way in hell I was gonna downclimb the flare.  Only one option makes things simple.  I hollered down “Simul!”  My mind went blank and I shuffled and smeared, jamming my shoulder and reaching my outside arm overhead to pinch the arête, until I reached the apex of the flare.  Body tight as a bow, I grabbed the behemoth #6 Camalot, reached up to the offwidth, and released the triggers to hear four soft clicks of the lobes nesting in place.  Suddenly the tension and nothingness washed over me like a wave!  I clipped the piece and fired up the offwidth walking the cam with me, the runnout was over!  It was grueling work, in hot sun now, but I remember floating up the stacks, arm-bars, and knee-heel cams as if in an effortless dream. 

Rowan cruised up the chimney with remarkable speed, and I was glad because the roof of my mouth was dry and cracking and he trailed the pack with our precious water.  He reached the belay dripping and exhausted.  My head was still shaken from the chimney lead but I found the resolve to lace up my shoes, grab the rack, and start up into the next pitch, the route’s first technical crux.  It was delicate and precise but well protected, and I pulled through into easier terrain and stretched the rope to the next ledge, then Rowan ran it up a fun pitch to the base of the pitch labeled “dreaded crux chimney” on the topo: pitch 10, an overhanging corner of mungy pegmatite leading up to the route’s crux.  It was 4 PM, we had a pint of water left, 400 or so feet to go, and we’d only eaten a cliff bar and some gel-shots each since 6:30 AM, for fear of drying out.  Nothing to do but go up.  The rock was rotten for a while but the climbing was fun, protection presented itself when I needed it, and the pitch flowed until the crux, which required pulling the roof that capped the dihedral. 

Fun Factor 1: fun at the time, fun to talk about later
Fun Factor 2: not fun at the time, but fun to talk about later

Now that I’ve passed through the initial growing pains of learning to climb, most climbs for me are solid Fun Factor 1.  Moments of fear certainly happen, but I’ve learned to quickly accept fear and transform it into focus and movement.  It’s been a long time since I’ve experienced the sickening sensation of mental exhaustion and despair that plagued my early climbing exploits, the prodding voice of cowardice which, recognizing that reality is scary and difficult, begs to escape, to wake up in some safe and fuzzy place, to find any reality other than the one happening right now.

High on The Flakes, suspended horizontally off of one hand with my last gear 6 feet beneath, staring up at a steep crack with a thousand feet of air beneath my back, that insidious voice whispered louder and louder within my skull.  The sum total of exhaustion, thirst, exposure, fear, and effort: the situation was just so hard.  I just wanted to give up, let go and wake up in some more sane reality, but I was starting to pump out and couldn’t afford to indulge that voice for long.  Contorting my feet to lock me in place, I managed to plug in a piece and summon a burst of power to surge upward towards good jams.  50 feet later I groped up to the belay and collapsed on the ledge, proper spent. 

At the belay after the crux pitch, spent.

Rowan also sent the crux pitch and was psyched to rack up for the last 5.10 pitch, which he styled.  The hard climbing over, we embarked up the last few hundred feet of broken terrain to the summit, somehow getting the rope stuck twice.  There’s nothing so frustrating as downclimbing featureless terrain searching for pro to anchor and un-stick a rope, mouth dry, lips cracking, with the lookout guardrail in plain sight 200 feet above.  Solely intent on reaching our water, we dispatched the problem as quickly as we could and shot straight up the last steep wall, which unfortunately looked “not that bad” but ended up being sketchy 5.9R on loose rock; at that point I didn’t care and just pulled for the top.  Mantling onto the canyon rim above the canyon bathed in golden light, I’ve never been so happy to flop on my belly on flat ground. 





At the car we sprawled, worn and beaten, on the pavement, indulging in sips of water and a celebratory Tecate and lime.  It took us 1:45 to rappel in and 12 hours to climb out; Rowan got his solid introduction to Grade V.  We slowly returned water and food to our tired bodies, watched the fading sunset dwindle on the canyon rim, and rallied for the drive back to Durango.






Topping out to the canyon rim at sunset. Photos courtesy T. Molnar


I guess this is what tired looks like




Tuesday, June 26, 2012

first taste of big mountains, Cordillera Blanca, Peru

Cordillera Blanca, Peru, June 2010
Direct West Face, Tocllaraju, TD
Normal Route, Yannapacha, D+
attempt on the Jaeger Route, Chacraraju Este, ED1

sunset on Pisco and Chacraraju from Yannapacha base camp

It was something of a ridiculous proposition, to take my fresh ice climbing skills, gained that winter in Ouray and Rocky Mountain Natl Park, and apply them in the vast arena of the Cordillera Blanca.  I figured every alpinist started somewhere, so in June 2010 I stumbled off a bus in Huaraz, Peru as an obviously misoriented gringo with a bulging backpack, shiny new twin ropes, and no climbing partner.   Luckily, Huaraz has been dubbed the “Chamonix of the Andes” for a reason, and my first night in a hostel I was offered a spot on a rope team attempting Nevado Pisco by a Czech guy sporting a rank nest of dreds.  Not impressed with his sketchy vibe, I cruised around Huaraz looking for climbers and soon found myself in Café Andino for happy hour, where I was invited to join a table of Europeans who were plotting a trek up the Ishinca valley in three days’ time.  I figured 5 days of acclimatization in town at 12,000 ft might be just enough; at least I could accompany them to base camp. 

 Ishinca base camp, host to dozens of climbing parties.  Tocllaraju sits in cloud on the upper left.

 Tocllaraju.  The NW Ridge, a popular moderate climb, sees a lot of traffic.  We aimed for the direct W Face.

We arrived at Ishinca base camp representing 7 nations and pounded coca tea while admiring the gleaming white face of Tocllaraju looming in the distance.  I fell into a fitful sleep, dreaming of the 400 meters of consistent ice up the headwall, and awoke inspired enough to join Nelson, a French-Canadian, and Sebastian, and French-born Austrian, in the torturous trudge to high camp.  Arriving in a sleet shower, we strapped on crampons and headed off into a near-whiteout to scout a line through the heavily crevassed glacier.  With Nelson in the middle translating between my English and Sebastian’s French, we successfully navigated a path through gaping crevasses and across a few dicey snow bridges to the within sight of the headwall.  

Nelson and Sebastian on the glacier

descending from our recon

That night, sandwiched between two men in 2-person tent with my pulse pounding in my temples, I had my first taste of Cheyne-Stokes breathing, a horrible condition which soon had me afraid of falling asleep so I wouldn’t wake up in a gasping panic.  At one am the alarm rousted us to don our boots and follow yesterday’s tracks, and at daybreak we started ascending an icy groove up the headwall, finding little use for our snow pickets as the face was mostly ice.  Unfortunately, the weather deteriorated quickly and when snow started sluffing down continuously onto our shoulders we reached a unanimous decision to cut v-threads and rap to the safety of the glacier below. 

 
Looking back at Nelson and Sebastian after crossing the first snow bridge
on the Tocllaraju glacier approach

at work on the face

A week later I met Nelson in the market to enjoy a one dollar meal and watch a World Cup game.  Food gave way to beer and the conversation soon turned to another attempt at Tocllaraju’s west face.  The next few days had a great forecast, so we agreed to meet the next morning to attempt a 2-day blitz of the mountain.  Now acclimatized, we easily hiked the 8 miles to Ishinca base camp, ate lunch, and ascended the 3,000 ft to high camp.  At midnight we stepped into our waiting harnesses and followed our old tracks across the glacier.  This time we had a strategy honed by our previous mistakes: fewer pickets and a dozen ice screws so we could simulclimb the face in a few massive pitches.  I was pulling the bergshrund at 2 am and soon lost myself in the steady rhythm of pick…pick…step…step, learning that it’s easy to run it out when you can’t see your last screw.  This time speed was on our side, and dawn found us well up the headwall beneath the first cliff band, which we navigated successfully and in 2 more simul pitches we gained the summit ridge.  Here I learned a harsh lesson about the effects of altitude, as that summit, 200 meters away at most, took us well over an hour of pure suffering to reach.  Trudging through sugar snow at 19,790 ft, I could only walk in 10-step bursts, after which I would bend over gasping.  Soon enough, however, we were standing on the summit taking in the panorama of the Cordillera surrounding us, and I knew that the sacrifice was worth it. 

Nelson ascending ice runnels towards the cliff band
 
cold morning at 19,000 ft
Having ascended the S face, a maze of seracs and steep sugar snow still guarded the summit

Unfortunately, a miscommunication on our two-day blitz plan resulted in neither of us bringing food for a third night, so we descended the NW ridge in a blur of exhaustion, crossed the warming snow-bridges on the glacier as quickly as possible, and ate our last cheese and bread while we broke camp.  We set off to descend the 3,000 ft to base camp in hopes of finding a mule which could pack our massive packs out to the road, but we arrived at dusk and found that the muleros had already left.  The only commodities for sale in the valley were warm cans of Cusqueña, Peru’s famous underwhelming pilsner, so we each sipped a can while watching the pink hues of evening fade on Tocllaraju’s distant summit, where we had stood only 5 hours earlier. 

 
High on the face, Nelson following

What followed was a hike I never want to repeat.  Our voracious hunger overcame fatigue and we booked it through the dark for several hours before the bare facts of 10,000 ft of vertical travel at high altitude took their toll.  The last miles ground away slowly in an agonizing blur of exhaustion until we finally stumbled into a farming hamlet, where a man called us to his house and graciously offered us tea while he called for a taxi.  Sitting on his corn-cob mattress in mountaineering boots, sipping tea and watching Mexican wrestling crackling through static fuzz on his TV set, the only appliance in the room, I tried to ponder the absurd intrusion of technology into this farmer’s home before waves of drowsiness overcame me.  I woke up an hour later as the taxi pulled into Huaraz; Nelson and I unanimously instructed the driver to drop us off at Polleria Diana, where we walked in with our packs and boots and each sat down to a roasted half-chicken and devoured it in blissful silence.  


Sunrise on the Cordillera from the S face of Tocllaraju


Looking down into the Ishinca valley from the summit ridge of Tocllaraju


Chopicalqui bathed in moonlight

Paul Wherrey, the nutty Aussie, on the approach to Chacraraju

sloppy conditions at our 1st camp

 waking to blue skies, the Jaeger Route, a continuous gully that passes the summit cliff face on the left, looms above our camp

 We lost hours trying to pick our way through the tumult of seracs and cravasses on the glacier.  Due to extreme glacial recession in the past 20 years, what was once a nice snow-walk is now a tortured maze of melting ice.

 In the afternoon conditions deteriorated again and we got socked in by wet clouds, still fumbling on the glacier.  A low rumble caught our attention and we watched a massive avalanche clear the whole face of Chacraraju's west peak.  Being that our route climbs a similar, adjacent aspect, we quickly agreed that today was not the day, and turned around for the long trek back to the Llanganuco valley.


As we hiked out, tired and supposedly "defeated" by the mountain, we were rewarded with a glorious sunset. In the presence of such beauty, the idea of defeat, and all frail human needs, simply faded into insignificance.